We all need a witness to our lives. ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness’ – Movie “Shall we dance”
And if a husband-wife relationship is about having a witness to our lives, then children and their children are the evidences. And we can trace this evidence from the start of the human life till ourselves..you and me.
Only the bonds of family makes all these witnesses and evidences and survival itself meaningful. Only the bonds of family makes us different from rocks and trees. It is not just the family members that make a family, it is the bond that makes a family.
A marriage and family is a framework of these bonds. People change, people die, but these ties remain. We cannot live in isolation. This is the legacy and the blueprint for the survival of the human race.
Today, this very bond, these feelings of trust and love, this is what is being attacked viciously.
For a false and temporary sense of freedom & individuality, the concept of isolation is being propogated with a sense of rabid righteousness. A new regime of laws and politics are being developed. So the question is..
How will the concept of family survive if one gender is shown as genetically and socially superior to the other?
It will not.
Let us observe the bonds themselves. These are built on the values of trust, love and sacrifice.
Today, the whole concept of marriage and family has been brought under the purview of a contract, a mere business of convenience and a framework of transaction.
But trust cannot be enforced by law, love cannot be enforced by state machinery, care cannot be ensured by punishment. Infact, none of these values can be brought under the purview of the State. Which is to say that Government may do anything to support a family system, but may not interfere or try to legalize the family structure. For in the very attempt to ‘legalize’ marriage, the inference is that anything in a marriage that is not seen as official or under the prying eyes of the State is illegal.
On the contrary, any social experimentation, especially by the government, on family obligations is counter-productive. The results of these experimentations have become spectacularly clear today. Today, we are witnessing the systematic breakdown of the family structures that gave the identity of the human race. In the name of women’s empowerment, male hatred is being preached as being fashionable. It is like cutting off one hand to make the other hand look longer. And it does not stop there. The State with the active help of feminist organisations are saying that this is actually good for the human body.
There already exists laws to combat crime and human greed. By categorising crime specific to family situations is an attempt to break down the family structures itself and not the crime.
Let me give you an example. We all have heard of the cases of disproportionate assets by judges and also about corrupt judges. Why is there no special law called the Corrupt Judges Act? The reasons are obvious. They will say that there is already a Prevention of Corruption Act. Dowry harassment is the same as extortion. Then why do we have a Dowry Act when there is already a law against extortion? Why have a domenstic violence act when there is already a law against violence? It is only to feed the egos of a few maniacs in power. These are the people who cannot see a family structure to which they do not themselves belong.
It is a fact that every bond is subject to wear, tear and breakage and it could be for any reason. In a situation where the differences are irreconciliable, the husband or the wife should be allowed to walk away cleanly. But our legal system has biased itself to such an extent that it gives two different verdicts to husbands and wives given the same set of petitioning circumstances. If a man asks for divorce he is automatically labelled irresponsible and if a woman asks she is said to be a victim of circumstances.
It is an irony that the very system of laws like IPC 498A, DV Act & Maintenance Laws which have been created as the champion against the Indian husband’s mythical greed and imaginatively systemized violent nature are tools of extortion themselves. A tool of extortion to combat extortion. This is the result of State interference into family life.
If this is not stopped today, very soon, we will witness the destruction of the fabric of family life and the very identity of India will be on the verge of extinction.
I demand the following:
Scrap IPC 498A since appeals to amend the section were ignored.
Scrap DV Act since appeals to amend the Act were ignored.
Progressively ensure that laws do not infringe and intrude into family issues.
Ensure that Government is made to pay damages/compensation to families who had to suffer the trauma inflicted by the creation and execution of these family specific biased laws.